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Thursday, 4 April 2013

What being unceremoniously dumped after 20 years has taught me...

My friend of 20 years unceremoniously dumped me yesterday.

"It's not me, it's you", she said. 
"You've changed and I don't feel a part of your life anymore" she continued.
"I'm done pretending I matter to you" she concluded.

"Huh?!" was my reply.

Much like my man Snoop Dogg - she dropped it like it was hot.

Oh sure, I could tell something was up. 

The multiple (ignored) phone calls to which I'd reason "She's busy", at least she'll know I'm thinking of her and will call back when she can." After a time I resorted to sending random notes asking when we might catch up only to be denied any response. 

Zip, nadda, nothing.

I don't know exactly when this happened, nor when she started feeling this way. No bust up or altercation along the way gave me any clues. No communication from her to let me know how she was feeling. Just a single text (Urgh!) memo to advise we were through. This was the first and last indication that something was up and that our long and loving friendship was over.

Sheesh...and they call me Tough Love!

Now that all is said and done, I can only respect her wish to terminate our friendship. Rather than let a range of negative emotions overwhelm me, I've decided to reflect upon our friendship with fondness and love and to send her all the very best wishes and whatever her heart desires.

Meantime, I've looked for the lessons to be gained from this situation. Here are some things that have come up for me:

  • Some people change, some stay the same. I want to evolve
  • I am who I am - love me or leave me
  • Pick up the phone or write a letter when saying goodbye
  • Make an effort for the people you love - it's worth it
And should you be faced with a similar situation, shake your good thang to another Snoop Dogg tune and remember; I just want you to know that you are really special.

Loving you, loving me...TLT x

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